69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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