You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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