I CAN MOONWALK!
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize