No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
