Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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