the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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