I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
My liver just had a heart attack.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
