remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
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