Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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