covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
