She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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