dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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