And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
