Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
