I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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