we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
