whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
