I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
