new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize
