After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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