I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Randomize
