That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize