I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
