I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
