oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
