I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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