just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
