I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
