Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
