CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
