It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
