CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Randomize
