you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
