I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
The adults are the big ones right?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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