he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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