you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
