that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
