Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize