What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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