No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
