i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
