you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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