How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
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