belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize