I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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