I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
