She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
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