loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
