normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize