so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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